Wifework

Thursday, August 6, 2009


I haven't been able to get my Twitter page to open for the last 12 hours, and I feel like my oxygen supply has been cut off. I've reached a point with the blog and the twitter page where I can no longer accept that every thought that pops into my head does not need to be shared with the world. I know what you're thinking dear readers How on earth can she survive such a tragedy?

Today's book, "Husbands and wives may say they are committed to equality, and indeed, many believe that they live that way. Yet, whether they are employed or not, wives still perform an astounding share of the physical, emotional, and organizational labor in marriage. Susan Maushart takes a radical look at the institution of marriage, exposing the truth of how far we've really come in thirty years. She forces us to consider why 50 percent of marriage end in divorce, and why women are responsible for initiating three-quarters of them."

What I've gathered from reading today's book is that being a husband is like being a celebrity, all of your bad behavior is overlooked and people practically throw a parade in your honor for every tiny little thing you do, even if it's something really minor like refilling the paper towel roll - and being a wife is like being a celebrity personal assistant, who runs around and does all the behind-the-scenes stuff that no one notices, appreciates, or thanks you for. But, having never been married myself, I'm going to have to take the author's word for it. But if any of my dear readers who are married would like to confirm or deny the author's claim, that would be great too. I asked my Mother if she agreed with the author, and I got a verbal tirade in response about how "Your Father never helps with the laundry, and he leaves that damn briefcase sitting in the middle of the room no matter how many times I ask him to put it away." I think I can safely take that as a yes.

I enjoyed today's book - despite it's flaws, and there certainly were a few. It was a fascinating book, which I chose because I had previously read another book by the author that I really enjoyed. I also picked it because I'm shallow and I liked the cover. The problem I had with the book wasn't so much with the writing style, or even the material that was included in the book, but rather with what was left out. The author shares that the percentage of marriages where the household work (including childcare) was truly split equally was between 2 and 12 percent, a statistic that has depressed me all day - and then she proceeds to spend the whole book discussing the couples that aren't like that. I would have preferred to hear a little bit more about the couples that are like that. Although, perhaps I shouldn't hold this against the author, since she shares that in one study conducted on marital equality, the researcher was forced to abandon her work due to a lack of couples to study. So, I'm going to cut the author some slack on that one, and go ahead and recommend her book because, for the most part, it was a very good book.